School.

The sun is rising in the sky at 8am, as I pull into school.
Yesterday, that meant pale pink and blue streaks stretching across the sky.
Today, it meant a constant state of gray light, with the world stuck in a sort of gloomy permanent dawn until 9.40 am when there were patches of blue sky revealed. I noted the time in my observation sheets.

I write down everything the teacher does in class at whatever time it is happening.
8.40 Students walk in and sit down. They take out their jotters and are quite chatty.
Teacher calls for attention.
8.41 Teacher starts class. Explains the aims, begins re-capping previous classes.
8.45 Teacher explains an activity. Repeats instructions. Checks everyone understands.
8.48 Students start activity. Most of them are on task. Chatty, but not loud.

And so on it goes.
It’s informative.
I’ve learned that KIDS will sit and work silently for a total of FIVE minutes before they start chattering a bit. Without fail. Five.
I’ve learned to pick up on times when teachers could ask different types of questions.
I’ve learned to notice what kinds of ‘bad’ behaviour are present in my future classrooms.
I’ve learned the names of the trouble makers – their names are said the most.

I’ve learned that school is different today than it was in my day.
I’ve learned that it’s better and more fun.
I’ve learned that it’s easier in some ways, and that makes me uncomfortable.
I’ve learned that it’s harder in other ways, and that makes me uncomfortable.
I’ve learned that kids don’t have high expectations of themselves.
I’ve learned that teachers don’t have very high expectations of them.
I’ve learned that teachers ask a lot of themselves and their students.
I’ve learned that students ask a lot of their teachers and not themselves.

I’ve learned that all of this is wrong and that I will change my mind as I learn more.

It’s all very confusing.
I haven’t learned to teach.

I think I can only learn that for myself.

Into the deep end we go.

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