The Bellwether

When I become a walking question mark
Things get hazy and unclear
And words flutter and fly
In fragments and flashes of brightness
Only to disappear before I can understand them

I become the intimidating blank page
Stretching eternally
unwilling and intimidating

When I figure out the answer to the question
The words suddenly pause, reflect
They begin to float, to let themselves be caught
The blank page stops scaring me
And suddenly there isn’t enough ink
And I can’t breathe properly
Until the words are out of me

Sometimes you are the answer
I see you and my mind is still
I have all the words and I can explain everything
I can write about you as easily as breathing
Words that perfectly capture
How your hand feels with mine

Sometimes you are the question
And I am muted
Cowardly, uncertain and insecure
And my words avoid me
Because I don’t deserve them
When I won’t use them
To tell the truth
To myself
Or you.

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